Posts Tagged ‘weather’

Yeah…I am fairly sure I flashed the guy flying the spray plane over my house today. There was no crash, and he didn’t do a repeated fly-by routine, so maybe (maybe) he wasn’t looking down.

Or maybe he just wasn’t shocked to see some chick having technical difficulties with her tank top in her front yard at the house on the Back 40.

Maybe he heard the rumors that she’s crazy, and didn’t think it was abnormal...

See, living in the middle of nowhere in the new-age dust bowl has it’s advantages. I have the best tan I have had in years, thanks to the comfy teal lounge chair in the front yard and the (usually) complete and utter privacy. There are occasionally spray planes or air force contraptions that fly overhead, but these are usually too high to see much of what I am up to…and waaaayyyy too far away to know what I am drinking on some of these brutally hot days when I know I am not going anywhere anytime soon 😉

No, for those of you that took a swan dive right off into mental gutter-land, I do not lay out tanning in my birthday best! I usually go for a pair of short shorts and a thin strapped tank top. You dirty-minded people…if ANYONE comes cruising by out here claiming to have been on a scenic drive or lost you have had it. I will shoot!

Anyway…today it occurred to me that all my tank tops have different straps, and that some are placed differently than others. This results in the possibility of a white, untanned stripe of skin running alongside the strap of some of the shirts. Not cool. 

Rather than running around topless in the front yard (I do occasionally have people that show up out here unannounced, and wasn’t crazy about the idea of sunburned boobs), I decided I could just shimmy out of the straps, leaving the top more or less in place. Easy breezy, right?

Well…I didn’t take into account just how breezy it would be as a gust of wind hit just about the time I shimmied that second strap down my arm and let it go. Of course the wind couldn’t actually steal the shirt, but it did manage to add to my shimmy enough to take that whole loose-fitting shirt down into belt/sash mode.

This all occurred about the time a low-flying spray plane decided to take the shortcut from wherever he had been to wherever he was going that took him right over me.

Thanks to the fact that I had stood up from my lounge chair to get the tank situated, and the fact that I had to perform some very deliberate movements to get my arms out of the straps, I am pretty sure that from a bird’s-eye view I looked like a crazily desperate woman struggling to get her top down for the sole purpose of flashing the pilot of the little plane.

Of course I immediately grabbed the shirt and pulled it up.

Of course a plane moves fast enough that by then he was past…probably laughing at the crazy topless woman living out in the sticks.

Oh well…hope he enjoyed the show.

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It is sometimes almost scary to be in here, and at the very least it is often quite confusing. I tend to run on several channels at once, with interference from each one creating an undertone of distracting noise on the others.

I figured I might be able to record a sample of my typical thought train and see how it looked in writing.

Ok…yes, I am bored and couldn’t think of anything brilliant to write about for the moment, so I am writing a post about nothing in particular.

I was sitting on the front steps earlier watching my son play in his sandbox with his favorite cat and found myself contemplating the energy drink in my hands. It bragged: non-carbonated, all-natural, guaranteed to quench even the “most intense thirst.”

I found myself thinking about thirst-quenching drinks and wondering why some work better than others. Tea and water, for example, work everytime…if the tea is unsweetened. Add sugar and it seems to detract from the tea’s thirst-quenching abilities. Sugary lemonade, though, can work great. So it really doesn’t make sense, since apparently the presence of sugar doesn’t really have an effect on thirst-quenching success.

That got me on a tangent of why non-carbonated beverages work so much better than carbonated ones…since you would think bubbles wouldn’t really make that much of a difference. I second-guessed myself on that one when I remembered the “crisp, clean taste of Sprite” which is carbonated, sugary as hell, and kills thirst as well as any tea or lemonade…if it’s cold. The cold vs. warm debate was not one I wanted to get into with myself, so I ignored that thought.

Speaking of thirst, I wondered…is that what it is like to be a vampire? The most thirsty you can get, where only tea or water will work, seems to burn in the back of your throat. If that is how a vampire feels, then I truly feel sorry for them. It would be horrible to not be able to turn to a huge glass of iced tea…

Furthermore, how can blood quench a thirst? It’s hot and sticky and I can’t imagine that would be a good feeling on the back of a parched throat. Would chilled blood work better? And would it somehow not be as good if they drank it from a cup with a straw? Somehow that just seems more civilized and less messy. Preferably a cup that is not clear… A lid would also be good, bloodstains suck to get out of carpet.

In Twilight, Bella drank her blood from a cup when she was pregnant with the half-vampire child. Wouldn’t that be impossible? A vampire is essentially dead…wouldn’t the sperm be well past swimming and fertilizing??

Anyway…those books (Twilight series) were so much better than the movies, even though the movies were entertaining. I liked the cast they chose for everyone except Rosalie…for some reason I didn’t think the actress was pretty enough to live up to the books’ descriptions of “the most beautiful creature anyone had ever seen.” I mean, the movie Rosalie had black eyebrows and white-blonde hair. That isn’t all that attractive on any creature. That’s just me though…I’m not really into tall blonde chicks, hehee.

Speaking of books, movies, and vampires…

Why can’t they make movies of the Anita Blake (Laurell K. Hamilton) series? Those were a hell of a lot more entertaining and imaginative than Twilight…and wouldn’t have sparked an entire nations disbelief in a sparkly vampire. Hamilton’s vampires were just as sexy as Edward Cullen any day…but they didn’t sparkle. They were too cool for that.

I liked that the were-animals in the Blake series were far more diverse than a few small-town werewolves. There are gun-toting wererats and stripper wereleopards…so much cooler!

No, I actually don’t read only about vampires…I read all kinds of things. I like crime thriller type books, and am a fan of Iris Johansen and Sandra Brown. Some of Stephen King’s stories are okay, but a little over-rated. Except Christine. Christine was probably one of my favorite books of all time. I loved that mean, jealous, bitchy car!

The movie was ok…not great. I am not usually thrilled with remakes, but that one would be a good one for the “movie people” to make a newer version of. They would have to keep the make and model of the car though…she just wouldn’t look right as a shiny new Chevy or something.

Too bad they’ve really run out of ideas for good movies. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen more than a handful of really good movies. They are all tedious and boring now. A few have been ok. The Ugly Truth was a little cheesy, but fun. How Do You Know turned out to be really good. Of course, I love Jack Nicholson…you cannot beat his sarcastic charm.

Did Robert Duvall die? I always liked him, too…he was (is?) an awesome actor. I loved his character in Lonesome Dove. I still cry everytime Gus dies. He was also pretty good in Days of Thunder.

Tom Cruise was so much better back then…when he wasn’t afraid to “act outside the proverbial box.” Interview with the Vampire…he made a great Lestat. I wonder if he is still into the whole Scientology thing, and how they felt this weekend when the world didn’t end? Were they one of the groups that were expecting us all to get snatched up out of our shoes Saturday?

Someone made a joke that the Rapture didn’t happen because God and Jesus decided it wasn’t worth the price of gas to come down at this time… I thought that was freaking hilarious, some people didn’t see the humor. I was one of the ones in favor of buying a bunch of blow-up dolls, filling them with helium, and releasing them at 6 o’clock Saturday evening to watch people freak out. I’m not exactly politically correct though.

I wish the wind would stop blowing…my daughter has been wanting to get out her slip n slide. Lately though, it would turn into a mudbath that I really don’t want to clean up. Not to mention, poor Dylan would blow away if he were on a slippery surface.

Cheyenne’s program at school is tomorrow morning, then they are going to spend a couple of days with Grandma. YAY!!! Peace and quiet!!

Maybe I will get some more done those two days…I really need to write some stuff for something other than this. Even though this is my favorite project. I also need to clean up the house. I have dishes in the dishwasher that need put away, and I have laundry that needs folded.

Those are my two biggest pet peeves…putting up clean clothes and dishes. I have no idea why, but I don’t mind washing either, but putting them away is annoying. My clothes stay in a pile most of the time until they get worn. This bugs the crap out of me sometimes, and other times I think, “who really gives a rat’s ass if they are in the closet or a basket anyway?”

I guess I answered my own question…sometimes I give a rat’s ass. Life would be so much less stressful if I could just let go of the notion that they needed to be put away neatly and let them sit in their basket. Then I wouldn’t have to put them away, but I also wouldn’t have to feel guilty because I haven’t yet.

Okay, that was over 1200 words on absolutely nothing at all, and I have better things to do. Hope you enjoyed the ride on that thought train!

Why, oh why did I come back to West Texas??? I am pretty sure I just watched a big chunk of New Mexico blow by.

There were plenty of windy days in NM when I lived there, but I don’t remember any days where the governor of the state actually sent out a call to action to all law enforcement and emergency personnel to spend the day literally driving all the roads in their area looking for fallen trees and houses, fires, and wrecks.

They predicted (and I believe were right) hurricane-force sustained winds for this afternoon. Listening to the scanner, I have heard more than one report of zero-visibility due to blowing dust.

The world is brown…that nice rust-color of dirt saturating everything. The wind is howling through the cracks and chinks in this century-and-a-half year old house. My daughter keeps getting scared because her closet door pops open with each major wind gust, and I haven’t yet found a way to describe the physics of it without confusing her.

I haven’t yet ventured outside, even though my son’s new favorite toy is being held captive in my truck outside. I’m not sure I could make it to the truck, it is parked upwind.

Looking out the window earlier, I am pretty sure I saw one of my cats fly by…it was hard to tell in the cloud of dust.